I Was a Condescending Jerk

Dear ManagerJS,

I’m upset about something stupid I did yesterday. I was in a meeting with several peers. One of them suggested an improvement to our hiring practices. Before I knew what I was thinking I was already speaking. I said, “I categorically reject that suggestion.” Can you believe that? Not, “I see it a different way,” or even, “I disagree.” But, “categorically reject.” Really?!

What a condescending jerk.

Within a few moments I was uncomfortable. It didn’t take long for me to realize I had gone really wrong. I played it out in my head. Slow motion. Trying to see why I did that.

The suggestion was one we had talked about before. I largely agreed with him. I just hadn’t found a way to really implement it. It wasn’t a top priority for me.

I see now that I felt called out — attacked. I see now that the thing that really drew attention to my shortcomings was my own impulsive blabbing

How could I have avoided my outburst? What could I have done in the moment to keep my head? Continue reading I Was a Condescending Jerk

Read: Crucial Conversations

About time for me to read Crucial Conversations again.

If Leadership and Self Deception had a baby with ManagerTools.com it would be Crucial Conversations. The book takes an intensely personal view of leadership and combines it with an emphasis on observable behavior and concrete action. More good information in this book than you can absorb after only one reading.

I highly recommend the book. It is universally useful. If you ever talk to other people then you will eventually need the skills in this book.